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This is an excellent article Meiling! I am 65 and the only birthday 'milestone' I have felt like this at is 30!😁 My experience was that it was the very first time I realised properly that one day I would die (even though I actually very nearly died in a road accident aged 11). At 40, I had a really fun birthday and enjoyed myself. At 50, I was with a new partner—the absolute love of my life—so very happy, and have been since. However, I have had somewhat of your experience in recent years (nothing to do with birthdays), judging myself for making mistakes in the past which may have led to difficult situations with certain people today. If only I had been more insightful when I was in particularly my 20s and 30s etc etc. However, I really believe in living in the present and that the past is gone and the most important thing is what I think and do now. Your attitude is great! You are doing exactly the right things to ensure a positive attitude today and a happy future. Kindness to yourself and others is paramount. (不好意思 I could not quite write all of this in Chinese yet!)🤣❤️

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Thanks Debbie for sharing your experience! Happy to hear that your birthdays at 30 and 40 were happy and fun so that makes me more excited for the future haha. Learning that you also had similar thoughts about the past makes me feel less alone in this too. I read a book called Midnight Library, which is a story of a lady traveling through time and making different choices in the past. But in the end each path she chose has its own ups and downs and nothing is perfect. This story helped at that time. Carpe diem!

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A song about Time, written by the English songwriter Sandy Denny and made famous in North America by Judy Collins.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJeLguRecYc

Across the evening sky

All the birds are leaving

But how can they know

It's time for them to go?

Before the winter fire

I will still be dreaming

I have no thought of time

For who knows where the time goes?

Who knows where the time goes?

Sad, deserted shore

Your fickle friends are leaving

Ah, but then you know

It's time for them to go

But I will still be here

I have no thought of leaving

I do not count the time

For who knows where the time goes?

Who knows where the time goes?

And I am not alone

While my love is near me

I know it will be so

Until it's time to go

So come the storms of winter

And then the birds in spring again

I have no fear of time

For who knows how my love grows?

And who knows where the time goes?

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Thanks for sharing! It’s beautiful. “I have no fear of time”

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I feel this way too sometimes, but I also sometimes think of it as a fun little challenge to solve. Like: "Wow, another year that didn't go exactly how I planned, I really better figure it out next year!" And it's at least a little fun during the first half of the year to try and tackle some of the problems I noticed while I still have inspiration.

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I've never thought of it as a fun challenge. I like this new way of thinking. Thanks for sharing this perspective!

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